A different sort of love story

"Do you want to hear a love story, Brian?" asked the aged but attractive woman with gray eyes.

"Sure!"

"When my mom was pregnant with me, my dad learned from an oracle that if Mom had a son, that son would overthrow his kingdom. He didn't want that to happen, so he ate my mom. Seriously, swallowed her whole. Mom was made of tougher stuff, though, and actually lived inside my dad for years. She gave birth to me there and nurtured me as I grew up. It was a little cramped, though, so when I got old enough I made myself a suit of armor and a spear. I used the spear to smash through my dad's skull and emerged into the world fully formed."

"Is this story about your dad and mom's screwed-up relationship?"

"No, it's about my dad's and mine. He ate me when I was in the womb, and I split his skull open. When I came out I thought he'd be angry, but instead he was overjoyed. I think partly he was relieved I wasn't a boy. After that I was his favorite daughter. Do you know he lets me throw his thunderbolts? I'm the only one in the world besides Dad who can send thunder. Sometimes he even lends me his aegis, which is impenetrable to any weapon. I could ask any favor from him and get it. I don't, because I'm more prudent than that, but I could."

"This isn't really the kind of love story I had in mind."

"I'm a virgin goddess -- what do you want from me? My point is that I sprang from my dad's head and as a result he lets me demand anything. Some combination of pride and relief, I guess. That worked out okay in his case because I was well conceived. But you can't cave in to just any demand that anything makes that springs from your head, no matter how much you love it."

"You're talking about Lover's Lanes, aren't you."

"As for example."

"So I should stuff it back in my skull?"

"Hell no, that's the worst thing you could do. But realize that a mortal idea doesn't emerge fully formed like a god does. It needs perfecting, especially if you're going to be living closely with it for a long time. If nothing else, at least check to see if it's a boy or a girl. Don't give your thunder to an idea until you're sure it's not going to overthrow you. That's all I'm saying."

"Thanks."

"Always happy to help. You just have to ask."

VI The Lovers

I know rather a lot about reading Tarot cards, at least for a layman. Ask me a question and hand me a pack of Robin Wood and I'll tell your fortune. But I don't actually believe the cards have any kind of supernatural power. I don't really go in for the supernatural; the way I figure it, it's outside my area of expertise. Science I understand. Art I sort of understand, at least to the extent I understand beauty. God is above my pay grade.

So why read Tarot? Because it's fun and because sometimes it leads you into new ideas you wouldn't have had without the cards as a creative springboard. I've been getting back into it lately, partly as a result of playing Persona 4 and partly because of a thread on a nearby anime forum some of you may be familiar with. I've done a few readings for myself lately. The weird thing is that -- if you impute any kind of consciousness to the cards -- all the readings have been rather insistent that Lover's Lanes is a good idea and that I should do it. I did a three-card spread on the project? The Sun, The Hierophant, the Five of Pentacles. Translated, that's approximately "this is going to cost you some money, but you will learn a lot (and/or teach others a lot) and have a stunningly positive experience." Last night I did a spread on relationships that indicated I should learn about them. And tonight I did a spread on impediments to happiness; at the head of the wedge to smash through the impediments was the Two of Wands (exploration, creativity, and faith) -- and the one card behind the impediments, the reward for smashing through, was none other than The Lovers. I shit you not. I don't even believe in the Tarot and I was overjoyed.

Still, I was even more interested in the parts that didn't fall instantly into place, since those are the ones that are a springboard to learning. Showing up as impediments were cards like the Ace of Cups, sort of the embodiment of the suit of love and emotion -- but it showed up as an external impediment, not a self-imposed one like, say, the Chariot (issues with control and direction), so it made me think about how other people's emotions might get in the way of my fulfillment in general and Lover's Lanes in particular. The Page of Cups was right beside it; generally court cards represent people, but I don't know who she is or why she might hamper me, so I assumed she was noise until her brother the Knight of Cups turned up as part of the solution. That made me think maybe both of these cards are me and I'm supposed to move from the Page to the Knight -- transcend being the messenger and write my own message. Which in turn bears on how I approach Lover's Lanes as a work of art. Not a demand, not even a suggestion. Just one path I could walk down.